i hate you because…

Co-worker, I hate you because you listen to holiday music at your desk after the holidays.

Stranger, I hate you because you work at AT&T and you continue to drop my calls. The "app" I want for my phone is "phone"...

Brother, I hate you because you try to act like your older brother. its not cool to act like a high school drop outs

Best Friend, I hate you because you love tagging me in the most unflattering photos on Facebook.Thanks, Bestie!

Mom, I hate you because you gave a FAT gene!

Sister, I hate you because i dont hate you i just hate that people dont believe were related because how flawless you are and how ugly i am

Stranger, I hate you because you're the slut dating the love of my life, even though I know it's not fair because I don't even know you.

Stranger, I hate you because you give me mixed signals. It makes me want to punch you in the face.

Ex-Boyfriend, I hate you because my fingers automatically type your name and also write it without my consent.

Best Friend, I hate you because you try to dress like me but end up looking like a whore. Are you trying to tell me something?

Girlfriend, I hate you because if we were as nice to each other in real life as we are in our Facebook comments, think about how different the world would be...

Girl I Met Last Night, I hate you because you got a 3.9 but act like an idiot.

Stranger, I hate you because you always take my seat in ES 101!

Current Crush, I hate you because you use "I'm not good at planning" as an excuse to be flakey with our dates. Man up!

Friend, I hate you because you force me to start with "i hate you because".