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Current Crush, I hate you because you are 4 years younger than me and my ovaries are going to want more out of this relationship than you'll be ready for.
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Brother, I hate you because you like Van Halen.
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Husband, I hate you because you keep comparing me to your friend's wives ...
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Current Crush, I hate you because every time you look at me or talk to me I somehow forget how to speak.
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Ex-Girlfriend, I hate you because you dumped me and then told me to talk to YOUR friend's about dealing with the break up.
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Current Crush, I hate you because you made my IQ drop to zero and my EQ drop to -250 when I talk to you.
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Friend, I hate you because you say "safe flight" to me every time I go on a plane. If you want to know if I arrived safe, just check the news.
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Boyfriend, I hate you because you can be te sweetest person in the world, but its excessive. and the extremely rare time you arent being lovey is when ur asking for sex.
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